Easing Separation Anxiety in Children

Separation anxiety can be challenging for everyone involved, parents, caregivers, and especially the child. The first step in easing it is understanding where the anxiety is coming from. Is your child worried about missing you? Have they had limited experience being cared for by other adults? Or are they feeling unsettled about something else entirely?

When working with children, getting down to their physical level is powerful. Meeting them eye-to-eye not only fosters connection but also reminds us to see the world from their perspective. This shift can help us better understand their feelings and respond with empathy.

Often, once a child feels safe and supported, they can be redirected and begin to enjoy their time with a babysitter. But getting to that point requires knowing your child’s unique needs. Some children benefit from advance notice that a sitter will be staying with them, which allows them time to prepare emotionally. Others do better with less notice to avoid building up anticipation and worry. As a parent, you’re the best judge of which approach will help your child feel most comfortable.

Here are a few tools that can help ease separation anxiety:

• Acknowledge and validate their feelings. Let them know it’s okay to feel sad or nervous.

• Create a goodbye ritual together. This could be a secret handshake, a wave from a special window, a unique hug, or a meaningful phrase you say every time.

• Encourage distraction through engaging activities. A babysitter can redirect your child with a favorite game, book, art project, a new toy or a walk outside.

Not every strategy will work for every child, and that’s perfectly fine. With patience, trial, and an open mind, you’ll discover what works best for your family. Remember: big feelings are not bad feelings. Over time, as children learn to trust that parents will always return, the anxiety often lessens, paving the way for smoother goodbyes and happier reunions.